As I write this, it’s not even the day before I set out for a fortnight in the Lake District National Park. I had my sample, my appetiser, my dry run, my recce as they like to call it here in the UK! That’s one of the functions my Dales to Lakes trip ended up fulfilling indeed. Now it’s time to build + grow from there, and I’m looking forward to it.
At the same time, I’m calm. The conviction of excitement isn’t through the roof. I think that’s a reflection of where I am right now, how I feel, the way I feel life is treating me + the fabric of my daily existence.
People
I don’t think I’ve ever been as independent, self-sufficient, isolated, and alone, as I have ever been right now. I mean, it’s not entirely a bad thing, it is what it is. I don’t have the quantity or quality of people in my life I would love to have, but that’s cool. I feel like this is just part of my journey, a way of building + evolving, or nurturing myself, + just embracing everything that comes my way. Time will tell why it had to be this way.
The people I once chose as family fade into memory, pale into pixels, sleep in the shadows of trails I once towed. I almost feel like it’s where they best belong as the paths I am due to embark on are destined for people who are currently strangers to me, and I like that. I want to discover more human possibilities. I want to encounter people doing things I thought would never be possible, but also people having values, qualities + capacities that I seldom encounter yet admire + adore in humans + desire experiencing from others.
Not long ago I realised nobody from my childhood and most of my youth is no longer in my life. The timespan of people currently lingering in my circumference is even smaller now, how crazy is that! I am the only constant.
Although this upsets me at times, it also means is I can renew + evolve without my history shaping who I am and hopefully how I will be perceived. I can reinvent myself to whoever I want to be. Ultimately, I am still me, at my core. Yet the evolution I want to express can have a greater platform because my past isn’t framing my future in the form of previous human connection. I am the driver, reviver, refresher, inventor, definer + creator.
Preparations
I’ve got a lot I want to sink my teeth into in terms of logistics + planning. I want to plot multiple routes for break days, good weather (high land walks) and bad weather (low land walks). That’s of course an oversimplification as there will always be crossover, but I want to have options to choose from then make my decision the day before depending on the weather + other logistics like accommodation. I am working a lot though between now + when I head back up the motorways, so let’s see what I can conjure.
Last time
I’m almost going to approach this like it’s the last time I’ll ever visit the Lake District – part of me wants it to be, because although it’s been epic + exciting, I want new discoveries that are completely contrasting to what I’ve already tasted. Despite the intricate differences between the National Parks + AONB’s of the UK, there are still strong similarities and I feel it’s time I invested time, resources + energy into whole new terrains + territories.
drBACKPACK 